Coffee Meets Bagel aims to rectify this problem by forcing people to be more selective — you can only go on one date a day.
I went through a vicious cycle of deleting and undeleting my account, ultimately deciding that the only option was to have hope.
After all, every date I went on could have — potentially — been phenomenal. In early 2013, I read a book that changed the way I viewed dating.
A few years ago, I was bemoaning my love life, as many early 20-somethings do when they graduate college. I let my friend construct the basics of my profile for me, and then I underwent the existential crisis of building my profile. And was I going to resort to platitudes about my typical day ("there really is no typical day for me! You can't bemoan your nonexistent romantic life if you aren't trying.
I was sitting at a diner with one of my closest friends, and she presented me with a solution: set up an Ok Cupid account. There were times when I would get frustrated and would delete my account completely.
I found myself messaging several potential dates (and I also found myself on the receiving end of some comical messages, particularly ones regarding my affinity for pickles — the food.) My very first date was with a guy whose profile picture was in black and white ("Artsy! We met at the iconic Slaughtered Lamb Pub in the West Village. It looks like this, and I assumed it was a metaphor for what was to come in my dating escapades: If there's one thing I'm positive about, it's that finding the right person is a numbers game.
" was a good seal-the-deal line at the end of the night.
(Although I admit that while I occasionally posted some abnormally flattering photos, I did have ample goofy, imperfect photos on my profile.) And it's okay if what's real seems completely flawed to others.
Once, a friend of mine was scouring my profile and told me that I talked too much about what I did and that I didn't sound chill.
So I updated my information to sound more amenable to men, and I procured more dates ... There's nothing wrong with not being a "cool girl," not being a sports enthusiast, and wanting to use words (especially if you write them for a living).
I learned it's equally as important to be honest in person as much as you are online, like admitting that no, you haven't heard of the band Com Truise and that the idea of playing catch in the park is not an ideal date for you.
(Both of which I did not admit in 2012 — neither date ended well for me, especially when catch turned into 'fetch' given my lack of hand-eye coordination.) The more dates I went on, the more I was able to realize what I found to be acceptable — and what I found to be unacceptable.